Understanding Internal Family Systems Therapy

Many people have never heard of Internal Family Systems therapy, often called IFS therapy, but it is one of the most transformative ways to understand yourself and heal from trauma, anxiety, or depression. IFS, created by Dr. Richard Schwartz, helps us recognize that each of us has different parts inside. These parts often develop in response to painful or difficult early life experiences.

These parts are not bad. They are protectors. Some are proactive protectors that try to stop us from getting hurt before anything happens. Others are reactive protectors that show up after pain to defend us, sometimes in ways that feel overwhelming.

An Everyday Example

Imagine someone picking up a prescription at the pharmacy. They are charged for a full order but only receive half the medication. When they returned for the rest, they were told there was a five-day deadline to pick it up, but no one had informed them of that rule. The only solution offered is to go back to the doctor for another prescription and pay again.

In that moment, an injustice part gets triggered. The person may feel furious, their body tensing, and heart racing. Disturbing thoughts might even appear, like wanting to yell, destroy something, or lash out. At the same time, another part of them, one connected to their deeper values, might remind them that they do not want to dishonor themselves or act outside of their beliefs.

This is the kind of inner conflict IFS therapy helps us understand. We can notice when a part of us feels wronged or unsafe, while also listening to the calmer, more grounded Self that can guide us forward.

Why Old Wounds Make Parts Loud

These strong reactions rarely come from only what is happening in the moment. They are often connected to older experiences that created lasting wounds.

For example:

• A child who grew up feeling overshadowed by a sibling may carry an unfairness part. As an adult, when a boss overlooks their contributions, the part becomes loud with anger or despair.
• A student who always worked hard but was never recognized may carry a discounted part. Later in life, being left out of praise at work can reopen that wound.

Someone who grew up invalidated may carry a dismissed part. As an adult, if a partner brushes off their feelings by saying “you’ll be fine,” it can feel deeply painful.

These reactions can show up in therapy for anxiety, depression, or relationship struggles. IFS therapy helps people see that when they overreact in the present, it is often an old part protecting them from an old wound.

The Healing Self

At the center of IFS is the Self. The Self is calm, compassionate, and wise. The Self does not try to silence parts or let them take over. Instead, the Self listens with curiosity, learns what the parts are protecting, and helps them heal.

Returning to the pharmacy example, the injustice part felt angry, and the value-based part wanted to stay grounded. The Self was able to notice both, honor them, and still choose a healthy response.

This is the gift of IFS therapy. It does not shame or reject parts of us. It welcomes them, listens to them, and helps them release the burden of old pain.

How IFS Therapy Can Transform Lives

Internal Family Systems therapy can support healing in many areas, including:
Trauma and PTSD

• Anxiety and depression
• Relationship struggles
• Anger and emotional regulation
•  Stress from work or family dynamics
  
  

People who try IFS therapy often find that it helps them feel more whole, more at peace with themselves, and more confident in their relationships.

If you are in Springfield, VA, or the Northern Virginia area and are curious about IFS therapy, our team at Soar Therapy and Integrated Wellness can help. We provide compassionate care for anxiety, depression, trauma, and relationship issues, using approaches like IFS therapy that allow healing from the inside out.

Transformative care begins here.